My Burlesque Journey

My Burlesque Journey

My Burlesque Journey: How I Found Confidence, Sensuality, and Joy

Look, I’ll always keep it real with y’all—progress is not linear. In my personal experience with building confidence, I’ve learned that it’s not about reaching a point where you never doubt yourself again. Instead, it’s about learning how to:

  • Bail on shame spirals,
  • Know when to take a step back, and
  • Practice mindfulness.

Okay? Okay.

That being said, I do feel pretty confident most of the time now (which was not always the case), and burlesque played a huge role in changing the game for me. But here’s the thing—what I’ve gained from burlesque is universal. I truly believe that anyone can embrace their own journey—whether it’s through burlesque, basket weaving, or whatever excites them—and build confidence by trying new things.

So stick around till the end, and I hope you’ll feel inspired to start your own adventure.

The Moment I Fell in Love with Burlesque

Like many of my burlesque peers and friends, the media I consumed growing up played a huge part in my fascination with burlesque and showgirls.

When I was nine years old, I saw Who Framed Roger Rabbit? in theaters, and Jessica Rabbit had a huge impact on me—along with classic Hollywood movies and cartoons.

Fast forward to the late 2000s, I had just moved back to my home state of Texas when I heard about a local burlesque show. The moment I found out about it, I knew I had to figure out how to learn burlesque as fast as possible.

My First Step into Burlesque

You don’t need prior training to do burlesque, but many of us come from stage backgrounds, and I was no different.

I was a pretty serious ballet student through high school, and that discipline gave me a little edge. I already felt comfortable:

  • Being on stage,
  • Learning choreography, and
  • Pushing myself physically.

But despite my experience, I was so nervous. I felt incredibly insecure about doing anything remotely sensual in front of real, live people.

On an intellectual level, I was all about it—but actually doing it? That was terrifying! It felt like a betrayal of everything I thought I was ready for.

Still, I forced myself to audition for a burlesque-inspired cabaret troupe. I got invited to rehearsals (we all did—it was just a couple of us, haha), but that tiny audition opened a huge door for me.

It led me down a path I never imagined for myself, and honestly, I think there was a teeny tiny part of me that knew this was where I was meant to be. Because let’s be real—there’s no way I would have pushed through the nerves and shown up otherwise.

The First 10 Years: Struggles and Lessons

It took me 10 years in burlesque before I truly arrived at where I am today—confident in my body, my art, and my perspective.

For the first decade, I was still caught up in all the external pressures:

  • Hustle hard,
  • Be thin,
  • Be strong,
  • Never show weakness, and
  • Always appear happy.

I didn’t have much confidence during that time—at least not the kind that runs deep. I had a phony, surface-level confidence that could be shattered by the smallest critique.

But here’s the twist—burlesque is actually what helped liberate me from those limiting beliefs.

Joy is such a powerful form of resistance, and I had completely let the joy fade from my burlesque practice.

Rediscovering Joy and Confidence

One day, I was having a really tough time, and it hit me—

“Wait a minute. I got into burlesque because I thought it would be fun.”

And it was fun, but my own thoughts and habits were blocking me from seeing how many of my dreams had already come true.

So, I made a change. I started:

  • Following my fun,
  • Setting boundaries, and
  • Letting my creativity flow again.

I stopped caring so much about being “perfect” and started having fun with burlesque again.

Another major turning point? At 37, I took up roller skating. Doing something brand new and physical gave me a fresh perspective on burlesque and reignited my passion.

Confidence Isn’t Just About Performing

Taking a burlesque class or performing on stage will give you confidence, but the real, unshakable confidence comes from:

  • Accepting yourself as you are,
  • Giving yourself time to enjoy the ride, and
  • Not comparing yourself to others.

If you’re about to walk into your very first burlesque class, remember:

None of us knew what we were doing at the beginning. (Honestly, I barely know what I’m doing now!) But we just went for it.

Direct action cures fear—just go for it!

If you enjoyed this story and want to start your own burlesque journey, join my MemberStrip program for classes, inspiration, and support.

This is me on December 18, 2008 in my very first “big girl” burlesque routine where I went down to pasties for the very first time. This was at the Church in Dallas (IYKYK) for their Christmas party. I danced to Sugar Rum Cherry and sewed every single one of those round cup sequins on myself. I almost still have the callouses to prove it!